Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Oh Stop It

I had the same conversation twice yesterday, with different people. Here is a list of several things the conversation made me realize:

1. I'm not good at taking compliments. This is something I intend to work on, just saying "Thank You" and not feeling like I need to explain myself any further.

2. I have a pretty awesome group of people that are so completely supportive of my weight loss journey. I need to recognize that more. And not be embarassed when they tell me something supportive.

3. I don't really know why this is finally working for me weight-loss wise. But it is and that's why it's so easy to stick to.

4. I need to not brush off what exactly I am accomplishing. It's very easy for me to act like this weight loss is no big deal. But it is. I am working hard at it and I should allow myself to acknowledge that yes, there are days that I really want just sit down and eat 1/2 of a Costco Pepperoni Pizza. But it won't help whatever I'm dealing with that day. And I will feel so gross afterwards it's just not worth it.

5. I'm realizing just how much I don't miss "normal" food. Yes, I miss the Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins The Boyfriend and I used to make on the weekends. But they will still be there when I reach my goal weight.

Okay, so both conversations I had yesterday entailed friends telling me how proud they were of me and how they were so impressed with the willpower I must have to stick to this diet so well. The funny thing is, I don't feel like I have any willpower at all. I eat the food I'm supposed to eat and I lose weight. The fact that I'm losing makes it so easy to stick to.

What has helped with this is that we have attended several functions where I have allowed myself to eat real food. And I did horribly! I ate everything in sight until I felt physically ill.

So, I personally know I have a lot to work on as far as what happens when I hit my goal weight and I start eating real food again. But that's quite a ways away and I don't feel much pressure to worry about that just yet (although I've definitely given it some thought). Which is part of the reason that I tend to brush off the compliments I have received.

It's hard to deal with the compliments because I am not even 1/2 way to my goal yet. I'm not even 1/4 of the way there, but I'm close. I feel like if I listen to the compliments too closely I will backtrack somehow.

But I'm working on that.

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