This is Getting Comical

Today, I wore jeans as it is Friday and therefore "casual day" at work.

Today I wore my new green t-shirt that I was complimented on!

Today, my jeans have finally decided to shuffle their mortal coil and get a whole in the upper thigh area, rendering them useless.

Today The Boyfriend met me for lunch and forgot to bring another pair of jeans, that I had requested so that I don't get in trouble for my inappropriate jeans at work. He has avoided being in trouble for this by being VERY sorry that he forgot them, as well as the fact that my thighs rubbing together seems to hide the whole for now.

Today, I wore underwear, which was apparently a blessing in disguise. Also, I am starting to feel better so instead of breaking into tears over this, I can laugh at it instead!

Great

Now I am sick. This is just awesome. And I know exactly where this sickness came from thanks to the extremely sick co-worker who hacked all over everyone for over a week.

Argh.

I am someone who has sever allergies and yet rarely gets really sick. Since I am used to daily headaches and sneezing and other allergy type stuff, I just don't know how to deal with this type of thing. Why do colds and such make me all emotional and weepy?

Good grief.

Um, hi

I haven't been writing because anything that is going on in my life right now seems to be a fight. I am really sick of pretty much everything and would just like to run away.

Happy Birthday to Me!

So, today is my 29th birthday. What I love most about today is that all last week when people would ask he how old I was turning, I would say 29 and their immediate response was telling me what a baby I still am (in a nice way, I just realized that could sound like everyone was being really mean).

Today has started out pretty awesome. I got to skip the gym, The Boyfriend made me an omelet, Lisa made this awesome blueberry concoction complete with Vanilla Ice Cream and Julie and Angela brought me donuts, complete with SEVERAL choices for maple since they know that maple bars are my favorite!

And it's not over! I am going to Chili's for lunch with Vicki and out to dinner tonight! Good lord, can you tell I like to celebrate with food?! And how nice that all my friends know this about me and keep me supplied with sugar all day!

My Dad called me from work at 7 am this morning and my Mom called me later and sang Happy Birthday to me.
Like I said, it's been an awesome morning.

Last week was another story. Last week I just wanted to stomp around and hate everyone. But this week, this week I think everything is good.

I am happy. And full. And 29.

Next week I will be cutting me hair off again. This is becoming a yearly tradition for me!

Such Sweetness

Said to me yesterday morning, by The Boyfriend as we exited Albertsons:

"I want to carry the bags. If you get hit by a car, the donuts will get all squished."

True love, people. True love.

Overheard at the Gym

Picture this in a very high-pitched Valley Girl type accent that's really really gratingly loud. Also, just to paint this picture for you, this person is the type to stay on the Cardio machines for over an hour EVEN THOUGH THE SIGNS SAYS "30 minute Time Limit", so she re-sets her time every 1/2 hour even if there are people waiting to get on a machine...

"So, I had one of those days yesterday where I just realized everyone I work with is stupid. Like Lisa*. I mean, once someone told her they could totally tell she was not college educated and now she's all fixated on it and paranoid about that."

WOW. That's like walking up to a really fat person and saying "I can totally tell you eat A LOT." and then being all surprised that you hurt their feelings.

AND THEY GYM WOMAN THINKS THE PEOPLE AROUND HER ARE STUPID!

*Not her real name. I was too busy trying to get my brain to not leak out of my ear to deal with people's names and such.

It Was Funny Then Too

The color printer for my office was acting up, so I was on the phone with IT trying to get it straightened out. IT Guy asks if he can take remote control over my computer, I say sure!

He looks around at a few things as I explain what the problem is. He prints a test page. I go to see if it works.

It does.

When I come back, he says, "I'm going to open an email and print it just to make sure everything is working. Can I print this email?"

Before it opens I say "Sure" because what could I possibly have in my work email that would be personal?

As the email opens I begin laughing very hard. He catches this and says "I won't read it."

The email was between a co-worker/friend of mine, containing various personal information about the Diva Cup, the pill, cycling together and how many Valentine's Days I have been on my period.

Needless to say, I didn't want to draw any more attention to the email, so I just continue quietly giggling as I check the color printer to make sure it worked.

After I get off the phone, I am laughing so hard I can barely talk. Leave it to me to have a VERY personal email opened and printed by the super sweet IT Guy. Luckily he has a wife and daughter so if he did read it, I highly doubt it was new information for him.

So Many Things

I may just number this to make it easier:

1. My niece has a brain infection. I totally thought these types of things only happened in soap operas, but here it is in real life. My poor niece has not had the easiest of lives so far. First she was diagnosed with Tourettes Syndrome and they put her on some awful medicines and now this. Please send good thoughts to my niece in Texas as she is in quarantine in her home for a month as she is on some serious meds that make her sleep all the time. Also, because of our Presidents freaking genius, "No Child Left Behind" crap, she is going to have to repeat a grade because of being out sick. The thing is, she isn't far behind and has amazing grades, but because she doesn't have the exact number of days in school, she is being punished. I hate our President and his completely idiotic ideas.

2. Valentine's Day is not over for me yet! As I type this, The Boyfriend just received a package from Café Press of some shirt that he designed for me and won't tell me what it is no matter how many times I call home and ask what I am getting.

3. Today is my Future Maybe Mother-in Law's* Birthday! Happy Birthday Marcia! Hope you have a great day!

4. I am no longer using tampons ever again now that I have tried the Instead Cup. I love it. Despite some, um, interesting beginnings, I am now completely in love with this and will never ever use anything else except some other kind of cup because good god people, these things are amazing. If you haven't tried it, please do so. You will understand why I am so happy. I mean 12 HOURS BEFORE YOU HAVE TO CHANGE ANYTHING!!!!
Also, less waste to throw away. Good for you, good for the planet. Everyone wins!

5. I am mostly finished with my first non-scarf knitting project, except I think the pattern was wrong or I read it wrong, but now I need to either start over or go buy more yarn to try and fix it. Instead of deciding I have left it sitting on the back of my couch for a couple of weeks now because I am mad at it for being wrong, so I guess I am punishing my poncho.

6. Does anyone else think we need to get some money together and send Garet to his own vocal lessons? If you watch American Idol, I am talking about the sweet cowboy from Wyoming. He was so damn cute and nice and actually aware of the extent of his talent. I adore him.
Ah! He has a website!

I guess that is all.

* We (being Marcia and I) came up with this name for her awhile ago because we both thought it was funny and I was sick of being introduced at The Boyfriends Girlfriend because really, we have been dating for a long time and "girlfriend" just sounds to temporary. So does "this is my Boyfriends Mom." I forgot about it until I starting writing this post. I may have to start using it again.

Why Me

So, The Boyfriend and I had a wild night last night of shopping at Costco. Whenever we are done with our actual shopping, The Boyfriend likes to look around the DVD section, to see if he can find any DVD's that he will then convince me we HAVE TO HAVE.
Since I don't really care to wander the DVD section (seriously, it is always busy and full of rude people who don't understand personal space) I decided to wander around the women's clothes section.

The women's clothes section of Costco depresses me. I feel so bad for the employees who are always there and always refolding the crap people just throw back somewhere near the pile they picked it up from. It just seems like a never ending job and no one even pays attention to what you are doing. Seriously, I don't know how these people don't snap and start screaming at the customers who walk up right next to them and completely tear apart a pile of clothes they just finished folding. I would actually pay to see that happen.
Anyhoo, the clothes section didn't have anything weird or interesting, so I started meandering towards the DVD's when this man stops me and in a very thick eastern european accent, asks if this is the only women's section in Costco. Now, I had noticed this man not just because he was intently inspecting items in the women's section, but because he seemed to need someone to notice that he was looking at women's clothes.
I answer him that it is.
"I am looking for something for my mother."
I say that's nice and begin walking away.
"Can I ask you something?"
Now here is where I should have just continued walking away. But NOOOO, I turn around and look at him.
"Have I seen you somewhere before? I work in Santa Monica? Do you live around here?"
I answer "I don't hang out in Santa Monica, so no, you probably have not seen me before."
"Don't you live around here?"
"Yes, I live in this general area, but I have not met you before." I continue edging away from him as I am now completely annoyed.
"Well I swear I have seen you before. Are you just looking around?"
"Well, my boyfriend is right over there looking at movies and I am looking at clothes."
He asks me my name. I tell him my first name. He shakes my hand and tells me his name is Sage and that I have a pretty name. (Really, I don't think my first name is all that exciting, so this is how I usually know some guy is just trying anything to get me to talk to him.)
He starts rambling about how he works in Century City, that his work just moved there and something about how he is around this area a lot and asking if I am American. I am totally not paying attention as I am calculating how quickly I can get away from him and how fast I can convince The Boyfriend that we need to leave the store immediately.
I say "Nice meeting you I have to go."
He says "Maybe I will see you around again. Or we could meet for Green Tea sometime."
I walk away.

Okay, I have never been one to get hit on a lot. I know it usually takes me a little bit to realize "Hey, this person is hitting on you!?"
But seriously, how many freaking people have fallen for the "I am looking for something for my Mother" line? I could give a crap that you are picking something out for you Mom. I mean, what kind of creep doesn't pick up on body language or the name drop of Boyfriend and back off? WHY IN CRAPS SAKE DID HE THINK I WOULD GO GET GREEN TEA WITH SOME STRANGE GUY I MET IN THE WOMEN'S CLOTHES SECTION OF COSTCO?
Why didn't I call The Boyfriend "my fiance'" like I usually do when someone weird starts talking to me?

At least we got "Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit ." That makes me happy. But I don't think I should have to suffer through extremely bad attempts at getting picked up just for cheap DVD's.

Nuts to You!

So, I don't have my Traders Joe's stuff written yet, but for now, I would like to say Nuts to You stupid freaking California weather! Seriously, it's February. Last year everyone was worried about all the rain and this year all I worry about is whether or not I can shove a knife through my temple without causing any serious damage. Because some days a knife would feel better than the sinus pressure I am dealing with.
And again, why does every weatherperson act like 85 degrees is great! Brilliant! The best weather every! I am going to kick them all in the head.
Right around their sinus area.

Monday, Monday

So, umm, I seem to have spring fever and it's only February.

I have felt like I am barely holding my crap together ALL DAY. But in a good way. Like I am all giddy for really no reason. Which is a good thing because I started today hating the world and pretty much most people in it.

Reasons Why

I should not be allowed near lemons or Sharpie's while bored at work. Meet my new friend Lancelot Lemon courtesy of L!

A Potpourri

Since I have been dealing with very random thoughts for the past few days, I thought I would share them with you.

*I know most people have seen this, but it makes me laugh so I am sharing it with you.

*I started this plant project almost 2 weeks ago with this plant that is supposed to appear with my fortune on it, but nothing is growing. It probably doesn't help that I keep forgetting to water it, but still, this just continues my running score of killing any houseplants. I can't believe I even entertain the idea of having kids when keeping a plant alive becomes boring to me after day 2 of taking care of them. So now instead of a cute photo essay about the plant growing, it will now be a photo essay about a can of dirt. A cute can of dirt.

*I am so annoyed at Trader Joe's right now, it has inspired a new section for this blog I will entitle "Nuts to You". Just know that whenever I say that in my head, I hear the theme song for those "Real Men of Genius" commercials, where, at the end the guy sums up what the commercial was about, "So, here's to you Mr. Taco Bowl Inventor" but instead in my head I hear "so Nut's to You Mr. Trader Joe's Broccolli that went bad after 2 days" or whatever else I am annoyed with. Didn't know I was so good at rambling did you! Just know I will probably post more now that I already have 2 subjects for the new "Nuts to You" section.
Also, every time I say "Nuts to You" I giggle.

*The Boyfriend and I have been Netflixing "MI-5" thanks to a recommendation from Julie, who was also the giver of the fortune plant that will never be. Much to my surprise, it has Hugh Laurie in it. He's "House" and I have the biggest crush on him, even more so now since seeing him in this. Good lord, he is a sexy man.

*I have finally started my first non-scarf knitting item. I am making myself a poncho and with any luck, I will be finished with it before next winter. I have already re-started it 3 times and thrown it across the room only twice. Yes, I have a temper.

*I have been listening to Kelly Clarkson's album and I can't get one of the songs out of my head.

I guess that's all for now. These don't seem so random to me now that I have typed them out, but I am probably forgetting most of my most random thoughts from the last week anyway.
Toodles.

My New Favorite Quote

"Chuck Norris is kind of like Jesus, but instead of dying for your sins, he will karate-kick you in the face until you achieve salvation."
Via Defamer.

*updated to add:

I HAVE HAD TOO MUCH CAFFEINE TODAY.

New Year, New You

I made it through the holidays without gaining any massive amounts of weight. Not that I didn't try. I ate anything I felt like eating, but I did manage to keep my portions somewhat under control. So now I am back at it and I even walked at lunch today to get some extra exercise in.

I have been feeling very stagnant lately. I have decided to clean my closet out and get rid of a lot of things that have just been hanging around. We are VERY quickly growing out of our one-bedroom apartment, and since there is no hope of being able to afford something bigger anytime soon, I figure now is a good time to get rid of some things. Not that I haven't been trying for awhile now to downsize, but I have a renewed sense of really wanting to get rid of things and change some stuff around.

This is of course not a good thing as far as The Boyfriend is concerned, as this will eventually cross over into his side of the closet, but he usually plays along until his packrat tendencies take over. It's not his fault, he is the child of a packrat*. He just doesn't have THE NEED to get rid of things like I do.

Eventually I will post more about my Christmas vacation, but for now, I have more Daily Show videos to watch..

*What is with the word "packrat"? It makes keeping things sound so bad. I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing until you own 35 cats and every newspaper until you were born, but, you know, if you just keep the odd thing around because it reminds you of a good time in your life, that's not so bad.

Home

I am back in L.A. now. Texas was great fun. The Boyfriend was very good at the gift giving thing this year. I will update more later. Lots of fun stories that actually do not involve my 16 year old nephews driving...
Right now, I am sitting at work, almost literally bored to tears. But somehow, I can't get the energy to write more than this.
Sorry.
Happy New Year.
updated:
Song Lyrics for "YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY" since apparently everyone is looking for them.
Yummy, Yummy, Yummy.
I got love in my tummy,
And I feel like a-lovin you:
Love, you're such a sweet thing,
Good enough to eat thing
And that's just a-what I'm gonna do.
Ooh love, to hold ya,Ooh love, to kiss ya,Ooh love, I love it so.
Ooh love, you're sweeter, Sweeter than sugar.
Ooh love, I wont let you go.
Yummy, Yummy, Yummy,
I got love in my tummy,
And as silly as it may seem;
The lovin' that you re giving,
is what keeps me livin'
And your love is like Peaches and cream.
Kind-a like sugar,Kind-a like spices,Kind-a like, like what you do.
Kind-a sounds funny.
But love,honeyHoney.
I love you.
Yummy, Yummy, Yummy,
I got love in my tummy,
That your love can satisfy;
Love, you're such a sweet thing,Good enough to eat thing
And sweet thing, that ain't no lie.
I love to hold ya,Oh love, to kiss ya,Ooh love, I love it so.
Ooh love, you're sweeter, Sweeter than sugar.
Ooh love, I wont let you go.

Happy Everything

I am off to Texas to celebrate Christmas with my family. We are all congregating at my sister's house this year. Should be fun. My 16 year-old nephew is picking me up from the airport, so I should come home with at least one interesting story...
Not much going on here. I am not really in the whole holiday spirit right now. It's kind of sinking in that I have to spend the next week without The Boyfriend and that makes me very very sad. I don't care who get's insulted, or how many guilt trips are thrown my way, I am NOT traveling next year.

I guess that's all I really have time to get in to.

I hate our President, but getting into that would take too much time. He is a complete freaking grifting ass and anyone that get's taken in by him is a complete tool.

The fact that this country was founded for religious freedom and yet there are people out there who truly believe there is a "War on Christmas" makes me ill. THIS COUNTRY WAS FUCKING FOUNDED FOR RELIGIOUS FREEDOM, but I heard someone on the news say he believed that even if we had a Jewish President, he should send out cards that say Merry Christmas. What kind of backwards freaking idea is that?

Cough Cough

I spent last night in a wonderful cycle of hacking, then coughing so hard I would gag, then running to the bathroom because I thought I was going to throw up, then drinking a sip of water which didn't help, then popping a cough drop and trying to go back to sleep and hoping I wouldn't choke on the cough drop if I fell asleep, but part of me not caring if I did because it would mean my throat would stop hurting for maybe a moment.

Today is my last full work day this week as my office is moving tomorrow, so we get the pleasure of leaving at noon. Let me just tell you that I work with a lot of whiny babies and also a lot of hard working people that kick-ass. I am so ready for this week to be over.

I seem to be on my second cold in a row this winter (ha, it's like 70 here) season. I very rarely get sick, usually allergy problems are the extent of my sickness. So colds and such are sometimes just too much for me to bear.

This is what I get for working in an office where it's expected that people come in sick unless they are on death's door. I find this just a stupid way of working.

Except here I am, probably contagious. But we are moving tomorrow. And there is still so much to be done...

This One is Going to be Long & Ramble-y

So, The Boyfriend and I decided to take a drive on Sunday, as a treat after spending over 2 hours dusting our apartment. I hate dusting with every fiber of my being, and being allergic to dust doesn't help any.

Off we go on our 2 hour drive down the Pacific Coast in which we end at Chili's (Yes, I like their food. A lot.) and this is now also a celebration that I have lost 13 pounds and 5 inches off my waist. The drive is pleasant enough. We have a good time goofing around and lamenting the fact that modern Christmas music is just shit.

We arrive at our destination. There is a wait for a table, no big deal, we continue enjoying each other's company.

We are seated. A small 2 person booth. I like those. Well, USUALLY I like those because we are seated at them quite frequently and we are usually on an outside wall (this is important later) so we have some privacy in our conversation.

As soon as we sit down I realize something is wrong. We are not on an outside wall, we are in the middle of the restaurant separated from the table next to us by a small wall. So, I put my drink menu up to block the other people out of my site. Now, I do this a lot because I really find it quite stupid that restaurants nowadays seem to think I want to watch the people around me eat. I don't. So I put up the drink menu, which other people have done around the restaurant as well.

Then it begins.

2 small girls, very towheaded, both under the age of 4. Any other time I would have found them quite cute. Not this night. Not at all.

The parents were sitting on the outside of the booth, not paying ANY ATTENTION AT ALL to their 2 small girls that were now climbing the wall to try and look at The Boyfriend and I. Then they began giggling, knocking menu's over on to us, staring, giggling, and generally just being really annoying. All this time, the parents didn't look over once at them. Not once. Never to check on them, even though they were standing on the seat and trying their darndest to touch us and stare at us, they parents couldn’t be bothered to check on their little darlings just once.

This continues on. I start shaking with anger. The Boyfriend and I can't have any kind of conversation, because we keep getting interrupted. I am shaking because I am gearing up to go and politely ask the parents to keep their children away from us, but I just know this will end in an argument, so I frantically try to find our waiter to ask him if we can be moved right away.

Now here's the kicker. As these parents are not giving a crap what their daughters are doing to the people around them, another table, which consists of a couple and their infant, flag our waiter down and politely ask if their order can be switched for take-out because their infant is getting fussy. I was so overwhelmed with two small germ-factories trying to touch me I hadn't even noticed the infant (who, by the way was the quietest cranky infant I have ever seen). It was just too much for me. Here are one set of parents trying to be so polite to the people around them, and of course we get sat next to the parents that think it's their god-given right to inflict their precious children on the people who were unfortunate enough to be seated around them.

I wanted so badly to go and ask these people to pay attention to their daughters, but really, all I wanted was to have dinner with my boyfriend that wasn't interrupted. I don't think that's too much to ask. Especially in a restaurant.

This type of thing just kills me. I adore kids. I think they are fun and I like watching people interact with their children. But I just can't handle this attitude that is prevailing of people thinking I should have to deal with their children misbehaving just because I made the mistake of eating in the same restaurant they did.

Children are not something that happens to you, in most cases. In any case, they are something YOU have to deal with. I COMPLETELY understand the restaurants that have adult-seating only or child-free hours. I don't care if parents find this offensive. I should have the right to a dinner that doesn't include trying to ignore the children hanging over the wall staring at me.

I'm not asking that people be punished that choose to have kids. I am asking that parents stop acting like I should be honored I was given the gift of being in the presence of their holy terrors for even a second. I am asking that people be aware that if their children are not behaving, it affects the people around them. I am way more accepting of a parent who is completely aware that their misbehaving child is annoying to the people around them and tries to do something about it. I do not have any patience for parents who pay no attention to their children whatsoever and can't understand how this may be annoying to a couple who are just trying to enjoy a dinner out.

Especially people who haven't eaten out in a month and are celebrating by eating carbs. And yes, I see the stupidity in celebrating my weight loss with fattening food, but man, it tasted good.

On a final note - Why do we treat smokers that choose to smoke like pariahs for making this choice and not parents who choose to have children that they can't be bothered to actually raise? Or teach manners?

I Wanna Be Loved By You

I have this song stuck in my head. I have absolutely no reason why and it's kind of driving me insane.

It could be worse, this morning The Boyfriend had "Boogie Wonderland" stuck in his head thanks to an ill-timed Target commercial. He's nice about it when he has a song stuck in his head, he just quietly sits there and tells you he has a song stuck in his head.

Me, I sing it as loud and often as possible so that He will get it stuck in his head, and then I have some company in my misery.

Shit! I just got "Boogie Wonderland" now stuck in my head just by typing this.
Now I have to resort to getting "If I Could Turn Back Time" stuck in my head. It is a little known fact that any Cher song will get any other song out of your head. Unfortunately, it is a fact I know all to well.